40 and pregnant...

Discussion in 'Pregnancy' started by ptahm22, Jan 20, 2017.

  1. ptahm22

    ptahm22 Member

    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2016
    Messages:
    22
    Likes Received:
    2
    I was going through another some Facebook posts and I found a touching post. The woman was asking for help on what to do. She thought she was in her menopause stage but she started getting some weird feelings. She has done three home pregnancy tests and they've all confirmed that she's pregnant. She has young kids and she was done with having kids. She is also worried that her age will affect her pregnancy.
    Any advice for her?
     
  2. Decentlady

    Decentlady Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2016
    Messages:
    214
    Likes Received:
    50
    Of recent there is trend towards safe deliveries even after 40 years. Previously any pregnancy after 35 years was considered risky but now the trend us changing and there are more normal deliveries of healthy babies even after 40 years.

    If there is no history of previoys abnormal pregnancies or deliveries as in fetal malformations or Down Syndrome babies or any other genetic defects, then the lady has absolutely nothing to worry about provided she is healthy.

    It being an unexpected pregnancy is a matter of personal decision I believe.
     
  3. Taliska

    Taliska Active Member

    Joined:
    Dec 18, 2016
    Messages:
    125
    Likes Received:
    33
    First, don't panic. Talk to her family and decide how they are going to proceed, because it is going to affect all of them. Will they raise the child themselves, adoption, what do they do if there are medical problems, there are a lot of things to consider. Whatever she chooses, and it is a matter of choice, medicine has advanced a long way even in the last ten years and safe deliveries have been managed far older than 40.
     
  4. faith

    faith Member

    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2016
    Messages:
    30
    Likes Received:
    1
    In terms of age affecting pregnancy, there is not too much to worry about here. First of all, worrying has never helped in anything. Second of all, people far older than 40 have delivered sanely, safely and in good health towards self and baby. Some have even given twins in their 70s, 80s, and 90s. This, of course, is not usually recommended, but you get the point.
     
  5. pwarbi

    pwarbi Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2016
    Messages:
    119
    Likes Received:
    40
    As others have already said, women are getting pregnant these days at any age so it isn't that uncommon anymore for a 40 year old to be expecting a baby. A lot is going to depend on the circumstances of the person involved as well as to what kind of advice they are going to need, and I'm guessing that the baby wasn't planned so the first thing she'll need to do is discuss what's going on with her partner (if there is one around) and other family members, that's got to be the first step.
     
  6. AngelaMc

    AngelaMc Active Member

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2016
    Messages:
    101
    Likes Received:
    29
    Recently I have heard of several women 40 or over conceiving. I don't think they have to worry about their age as long as they are healthy enough to carry the baby. My mother had me later in life and she did great. All women are different and everyone has different medical issues, so with that being said, I think with Doctors monoriting the older mothers it should be fine. :)
     
  7. tony

    tony Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    222
    Likes Received:
    32
    The first thing to consider is the health of the mother at 40. If she has a sound health I don't think there will be any problem conceiving and giving birth at 40. The woman shuld have to keep to regular ante natal care and take the necessary nutrients to support her body. It's just mere psychological thinking that at 40 it maybe hard to deliver.
     
  8. moondebi

    moondebi Member

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2016
    Messages:
    47
    Likes Received:
    8
    Surprise pregnancy during this stage of life is not uncommon. People think they cannot get pregnant but destiny plans otherwise.
    Giving birth will be entirely her own choice, but medical technology has advanced manifold to take care of the heath aspects during pregnancy. However, late pregnancies sometimes see birth defects. So, those possibilities should be eliminated.
     
  9. Alexandoy

    Alexandoy Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    971
    Likes Received:
    261
    What I can say about late pregnancies is to be conscious of your lifestyle. Like any pregnancy, no late nights, no excess food, enough exercise and take vitamins if necessary. Also, don't forget the regular checkup. Being pregnant at age 40 is not a rare case although it's not a standard either. The effect is not much on the mother but more on the baby since late pregnancy is not advisable due to the high probability of abnormalities of the baby. But I don't believe that. My youngest sister was born when my mother was past 40 and my sister is still okay until now that she's past 40 herself with 4 children.
     
  10. Mika

    Mika Active Member

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2016
    Messages:
    515
    Likes Received:
    136
    I don't see it as a big issue if the lady is willing and ready for it. Incidentally, I have met a lady recently whose husband was in Bahrain for years working as an engineer. The lady lives and works in Australia and his husband arrived here to join her wife and two teenage sons 4 months before. She is 2 months pregnant now and ready to welcome her third child with open hands. I think it's all about how you think about it and your mindset.
     
  11. Nocturnal Writer

    Nocturnal Writer Active Member

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2016
    Messages:
    719
    Likes Received:
    81
    I have learned from unconfirmed report that it is too dangerous for a woman of 35 to get pregnant. It's pointed out that her life would be imperil so as with her baby. That is why as a teacher by profession if there is a time or occasion that I would be with our students I advise them to get married by the age of 21 and to have a children of their own and refrain from getting pregnant after then age of 30 or more. My advice is unfounded but at least they have the idea.

    Well in rare cases, there are women who are pregnant beyond the age of 30 and they get no problem. The only problem I think is the health condition of the mother to bear another child after 30 years old. Generally speaking if there are instances of women who get pregnant beyond the age limit, they don't need to worry as long as their health is okay.
     
  12. Mika

    Mika Active Member

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2016
    Messages:
    515
    Likes Received:
    136
    Is it? Well, I am not sure if a woman over 35 is in any danger if she conceives at this age or even at 40 or later. As much I know a woman can deliver normally as long her menstrual cycle is fine or she can deliver even after that if she wishes to conceive artificially if she is fit physically. Most women pursue a career these days so marriage at the age of 21 is just not possible but most women marry in 26-30 age group so in most cases they conceive and deliver normally at 35-40 without any issue.
     
  13. thisnthat

    thisnthat Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 29, 2016
    Messages:
    195
    Likes Received:
    69
    The first thing I would recommend is going to the doctor for confirmation. While home tests are generally accurate, I'd still visit the doctor. She also needs a check up to make sure it's a normal pregnancy and not ectopic or anything.

    As noted above, women can and do have babies at later ages these days. If she's in good shape, she will have fewer worries. If not, now is the time to get in better shape.

    She might also require a ob/gyn that specializes in high risk pregnancies (if it proves to be high risk). I might consider that anyway if I got pregnant past 40, just for the added care.

    A good support system is needed. There are centers for surprise pregnancies that can help. They aren't strictly for teenagers.
     
    Mika likes this.
  14. Mika

    Mika Active Member

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2016
    Messages:
    515
    Likes Received:
    136
    I know someone who joined a Gym at regular basis recommended specially by her doctor for the vary purpose and regular walks for 30-40 minutes. She had it all planned well in advance so she had taken all possible precautions but to be very frank pregnancy at 40 is nothing strange in my country so women conceive and deliver without worries whatsoever.
     
    ABlessed likes this.
  15. Archimedes

    Archimedes New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 18, 2017
    Messages:
    22
    Likes Received:
    4
    First, I congratulate her for another precious gift of life growing inside her. My friend has had her 11th child at 47 years old in February 2017. The healthy baby boy is so much loved and the 10 siblings think that their brother is a gift to them.
    I had my seventh baby at 44 years old. My seventh cesarean birth.
    I wanted to have more but I naturally can't anymore.
    The woman is going to be just fine. Keep healthy. Learn to be happy. Trials and problems in life are realities of life-- if we learn to keep in touch with reality and address them and deal with them, they are ways to strenghten us and make us wiser as we go through them.
     
    Last edited: Apr 29, 2017
    ABlessed likes this.
  16. Shine_Spirit

    Shine_Spirit Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2017
    Messages:
    101
    Likes Received:
    27
    I think the first thing she has to do is: don't panic! She has to thank God that she could have received this gift at this age. Then, being able to count on the help of the family is of the utmost importance (because going through this alone can be traumatizing... for both for, her and the baby).

    Of course it won't be so easy to deal with, but for everything in life there is a way (and surely her maternal instinct will speak louder at some point). She'll be very happy. :)
     
  17. Miches

    Miches Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2016
    Messages:
    230
    Likes Received:
    45
    The best advice to give her is to keep the baby, stay healthy and strong. enlist the support and understanding of other family members, and make sure that she gets regular check up. Depending on her state of fitness and overall health, her body may not be in the prime age for pregnancy and childbirth, but that doesn't mean that she can't carry the child through its term. I would say she's lucky because some celebrities I know were only able to get pregnant at 40 and beyond with science and doctor's help. While it is true that the risk for carrying a child with abnormality gets higher as a woman or her partner ages, there are far more children born healthy than those who are affected by some developmental problems.
     
  18. ABlessed

    ABlessed Member

    Joined:
    Dec 16, 2016
    Messages:
    32
    Likes Received:
    11
    If a woman is healthy at 40, then there is no reason to be overly concerned about having a baby at that age. We are talking 40, not 80, and today's 40 with all of the focus on healthy eating and preventative medicine is not the 40 of yester-year. Janet Jackson is 50 and just recently gave birth to a baby. I can understand that the woman may have felt like she was finally "free" of all of the things that come with having and raising a little newborn baby, but if she loves kids, is mentally and financially stable and has a support system in place, she should be fine.
     
  19. thisnthat

    thisnthat Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 29, 2016
    Messages:
    195
    Likes Received:
    69
    I had my youngest in my thirties and it was definitely harder than having a baby in my 20s. Of course, I was in better shape in my 20s as well, when I could do whatever and didn't have to work as hard to stay in shape. I think you have a different mindset when you're younger as well, or at least I did.

    I wasn't planning on having any babies that late, and I did have some problems throughout the pregnancy. Thankfully, I went full term and she was healthy.

    Today, things are even better. There is so much more and better care available and it is more common for women to have babies a bit later in life. Your friend might even want to find a support group (of even visit a forum ;)) or something for extra support.
     

Share This Page