Just yesterday I saw one parent was beating her kid as she wasn't listening anything to her. I am not sure if that lady is regular in such kind of punishment so I can't say more. But do you think beating is the right way to make them understand. I guess it should be the last option. I am not saying one shouldn't go for it at all as for some situation beating is necessary. But surely it should not be frequently. What you say?
They say that when you spare the rod, you spoil the child. Therefore, spanking them a little just enough to make them understand that what they are doing is wrong, is not bad. The only problem occurs when parents, allow their anger to get out of hand and they let it all out on the child. Just like you said, I too believe that beating should be the last option. A parent should first of all try to explain to the child with a lot of love and patience that what they are doing is wrong. I believe that it is also good, that parents regularly teach their children what is expected of them in certain situations, in advance. For example, make them understand that when you go for shopping, they are to stay as close to you as possible. Making things clear in advance, will allow a child to know their limits and stick by them, hence avoiding any trouble.
I also think that beating the child is a sure way to instill in him that what he did was wrong, although it should not get overboard. My parents raised the both of us siblings in that manner, we would get hit and punished whenever we did something wrong, so it stuck in our heads, although as we got older we started to do as we please since we are of age already and we were too old to be beaten by our parents.
Although I don't agree with spanking either, there is a huge difference between spanking and what most people here in the U.S. refer to as "beating." If you "beat" your child here in the U.S. you're off to prison, as you rightfully should be. I hope we're not thinking of the same thing when we talk about beating. Merriam-Webster defines beating as "An act of striking with repeated blows so as to injure or damage." So in this case, child abuse and also a terribly ineffective way to discipline per all modern scientific studies (unless your goal is to raise somebody mentally scarred and likely to become a 'beater' themselves.) I'm all for free speech and respect other cultures immensely but we can't have anyone advocating this here. I'll leave this thread open for now just incase there's been a misunderstanding on my part but may have to lock it if things get out of hand.
Okay, so yes I wasn't talking about beating that way. I guess beating is the wrong word and I should have know it. But yes I was referring to spanking only. Beating is surely not right and yes there should be law about that. About spanking even more spanking is not good as I mentioned earlier it should be the last option. As kid will get used to of it and they will not listen.
Spanking and beating are two different things. Beating is not tolerated even here in India. Teachers have gone behind bars for doing that. Spanking is fine provided it has a positive effect on kids. Some kids react differently. They become more stubborn (lol). Time diffuses situations. The best way is to distract a kid's attention to something that they would want to see or experience.
Beating or spanking is all the same thing because some parents do not know the difference. I have never and will never advocate to a child being disciplined via any of these methods. There are so many effective ways a child can be corrected or brought up that does not involve physical abuse. When you beat/hit/spank a child, you are destroying a sensitive core of that child's ability to comprehend love. That child will grow up finding it hard to love and trust people easily. Don't do it. It does not bring anything good.
I have been a school teacher at different intervals and I have observed that children who are spanked regularly fare better in life in terms of discipline. Those who are never spanked become spoilt brats, allow me to use the term. But there is the danger of haremn them so a stick and carrot policy works best, balance is the tagline.
Beating a kid is a criminal act, even spanking for me is too violent. I don't advocate spanking because I was spanked in my youth although I've been an obedient and gentle child and I took it against the parent who did it to me. Just think about it, if you spank your child badly today and you die tonight, what would the child remember about you? You can be sure that it will haunt the child for life. Additionally, spanking can get out of hand and result to injury. I don't believe in light spanking either because kids will simply not buy it. There are many ways to discipline a child without hurting them physically. You can withhold privileges or make them face the wall for a certain length of time. Whatever it is, the parent need to explain why he/she is being punished and reinforce what behavior is expected.
Violence is never the solution for anything, but having this said the fact is that kids can drive us nuts, especially when we are tired. We need to discipline ourselves for the hardest task in the world, being a good parent, and violence doesn't fit here.
I am against beating the child. It is not a good tool to teach the children discipline because it has its drawbacks. I have cousins who have experienced excessive beatings from their father that they grew up to be rebels without a cause. However, I have to agree that that there are children who needed to be disciplined by beating, those stubborn and rebellious kids who, even being a toddler, have already shown their criminal instinct. The beating can at least tell the toddler that what he is doing is wrong.
I was never beaten either at school or by my parents. I am a responsible citizen and an asset to the world. Teachers have no time nor patience to adapt to other ways to discipline kids.
I don't think that beating kids is a good way to make them understand why they did something wrong. IN very rare occasions maybe, but not all the time. You just have to find a way to communicate with them so they could understand what is right and what is wrong.
I will say beating should be a parent or guardians last resort. Why I say this is that continuous beating of a child does more harm than good to the kid. If a child is beaten too much, he/she will get used to it and as such therefore the beating won't be having any effects on him. What I recommend is giving a child punishment; like telling him to squat, pick pin, deny him/her some goodies you normally give the kid. It will definitely make the child feel bad and take corrections from the things he/she do wrong.
Beating children is very common in schools in my country when I was studying school and only recently the law has been made strict to punish the teachers who beat the children. I don't think it is right to beat or spank a child to make them understand that they had done something wrong. This only will develop hatred if it is done constantly. My mother used to beat me when I was a child and that developed a fear on her instead of love. I decided on that day that when I have kids in the future I will make sure not to beat or even spank them and make them understand in a gentle way which will make them responsible and not do that again.
Beating and spanking is a two different thing in my opinion. The way I see it, spanking is a normal or mild punishment for kids usually by striking them with bare hands, while beating is way more harsh. Spanking for me is fine as long as you don't hit the kid's sensitive parts (head, tummy, chest, back). I also believe that disciplining a child depends on the parent or the guardian who is raising the child. If parents can discipline their child/ren by simply talking to them and without hitting them then that would be great.
Yeah, every kid gets a spanking now and again, but beating is harder. Either cases, both should be avoided if we have enough art and patience. That's the issue, these days most parents don't have patience to deal with their kids.
More than parents I am concerned about some teachers who neither have love nor patience to deal with kids these days. In the good old days it was their passion that prompted them to take up teaching
I agree with that. Best thing is that to distract kid to other direction. Yes Spanking is fine sometime but more of it should be avoided. As I have seen that kids really get used to of all these things fast. So getting used to of spanking will be surely not good thing. So yes occasionally when it is really needed one can go for it.
Yeah, I am not even talking about teachers, but there is no spanking or beating in those cases I believe. You said something very right though, to teach a teacher needs to love kids, if they don't we do notice, and the kids are the ones that suffer the most about it. Not just anyone could be a teacher imo.
Teachers are paid well and then they have the scope for giving tuitions which adds to their coffers. It is time parents kept a vigil on their kids as most kids will not report to their parents what they experience in their class as they feel they got the beating because they behaved badly.
I would like to resort to other types of punishment but not beating the kid up. And if a child doesn't want to listen to you mostly all the time then there is something wrong with how you raised the kid. I mean my wife's brother is autistic, but he does know how to control his tantrums most of the time because we taught him. He gets punished like facing the wall if he did something bad or we would keep his toys away from him. I mean, an autistic who is non verbal is a lot harder to teach than a kid who can speak his mind.
Well I would not really phrase it like that and that makes me worried. A little more harsh punishment though, I am still not exactly sure where I stand here, although I will not write it off as bad parenting, because I sure fot slapped a few times when I was younger, and yes it worked, for me at least.
