How many babies?

Discussion in 'Babies' started by Vinaya, Dec 8, 2016.

  1. Vinaya

    Vinaya Member

    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2016
    Messages:
    78
    Likes Received:
    7
    How many babies do you have, or how many babies do you want for yourself?
    My wife and I have decided that we will have just one baby. We do not want another baby because, raising babies is expensive and we do not want to go through frustration, pain and anxiety again.
     
    to7update likes this.
  2. Jason76

    Jason76 Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    380
    Likes Received:
    61
    It depends on how many I can afford. However, a lot of people have a lot of money, yet few kids. Do you think that's the right move on the part of such people? Does anyone feel like they have an obligation to have a lot of kids simply cause they can afford it?

    What do you all think of rock stars like David Lee Roth of Van Halen who never married?
     
    Last edited: Dec 8, 2016
    to7update likes this.
  3. pwarbi

    pwarbi Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2016
    Messages:
    119
    Likes Received:
    40
    How many children we decide to have can depend on a lot of factors. Many people would like a big family but know that they can't afford it so limit themselves to one or two, others on the other hand have the means for a big family but prefer just to have the one like @Jason76 says. Personally I think that two is enough for us, but I do understand why people want more...it's all just down to what you prefer at the end of the day I guess.
     
  4. tony

    tony Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    222
    Likes Received:
    32
    I think when it comes to number of children we hope to have we should leave that to fate and conditions. Situations do change, if you were thinking you don't have the means to raise a large family now what if your financial status change for the better tomorrow. I think some flexibility is required here.
     
  5. Holmes22

    Holmes22 Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2016
    Messages:
    373
    Likes Received:
    57
    Well this is just one where you have to really listen to your body and your environment and go with what feels right. There is no right number for anyone or anything like that, but to each their own. I know that I need a small family, but that is just me.
     
  6. Alexandoy

    Alexandoy Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    849
    Likes Received:
    252
    My idea of a family is one with 3 or 4 children with age gaps of 2 to 3 years. Unfortunately, my wish was not granted. I have a daughter with my first wife but my second wife was not able to get pregnant due to problems with her reproductive system. But I guess we are still happy with our family even though it’s only me and her plus our dogs. And for the young couples, my advice is to have children while they are young but not more than 4 kids unless they have ample resources to rear their children.
     
  7. Decentlady

    Decentlady Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2016
    Messages:
    214
    Likes Received:
    50
    I would say two kids are a good number but then this is a personal decisions. People have their own reasons for having a number of children.

    However, to those planning to have just 1 child I would say that, every child has a right of having a sibling and a playmate. Just think how you turn towards your siblings for important moments and difficult times, give them the opportunity to have atleast one blood relation after your death. Be fair.
     
    firstcry likes this.
  8. Mika

    Mika Active Member

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2016
    Messages:
    515
    Likes Received:
    136
    We wanted to have two but after my wife had miscarriage we decided against the second one. I have no regrets that we took this decision but I feel that my wife is happy with her career and our only daughter is growing normally under two attentive parents. I think 2 is the right number of children for a family though.
     
  9. James McAllister

    James McAllister Kinacle Employee Staff Member

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2016
    Messages:
    344
    Likes Received:
    174
    Good question and one that I've thought about a lot.

    I do know for certain I want at least one son and one daughter. So whether that's 2, 3, or more, I guess it's not up to me. But regardless, I know I will be happy. :emoji_slight_smile:
     
    to7update likes this.
  10. to7update

    to7update Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    261
    Likes Received:
    75
    LOL I like that you specify the gender @James McAllister, good luck with that. :p I know people who had 1-2-3 boys and still trying to get the girl and ended up with 4 boys. :)

    I have two boys and I wouldn't mind having more, but for this to happen I would need to have a larger income, so it's just not possible.
     
  11. James McAllister

    James McAllister Kinacle Employee Staff Member

    Joined:
    Nov 20, 2016
    Messages:
    344
    Likes Received:
    174
    With my luck, that's exactly what's going to happen. Actually every time I've seen families with 3, 4, 5 of the same gender I keep thinking 'that's probably going to be me.'

    And if that's the way it turns out, that's ok. It's not like I would love them any less. :emoji_smile:
     
    to7update likes this.
  12. kamai

    kamai Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    262
    Likes Received:
    65
    I only have one baby girl for know and would love to have one more. I guess only time will tell since we are going through economic hardships I wouldn't want to be short on anything my children will need. It all depends but I was thinking I will have another one once my baby turns 8-10 years old.
     
  13. Jason76

    Jason76 Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    380
    Likes Received:
    61
    I have an odd feeling that some parents cannot get a boy or girl so they treat the last sibling like the opposite gender. However, I don't think that's healthy for the child, even though I am not a strong social conservative. In my view, a kid should raised like their gender, at least somewhat, until they become older.
     
  14. Greengrl

    Greengrl New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2016
    Messages:
    25
    Likes Received:
    6
    I have 5 children. I never really had a number of how many children I wanted to have, I knew I wanted at least 2.
    I have 6 siblings. I was number 6, and was born much later in life than 5 of my siblings. I loved coming from a large family, I just always assumed I would have one also. My ex was the oldest of 3, and he would've been happy with 1 or 2.
    The first 4, although not planned, we're happy surprises. Not that I would give my youngest back for anything, but that was the first time the news concerned me more than excited me. I think that's when I knew it was time to stop.
     
  15. to7update

    to7update Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    261
    Likes Received:
    75
    Yeah, that just shows you have love in your heart and that you love kids. I wouldn't mind having a bunch either. My in-laws have some neighbors who have 11 kids (yes, 11) and only the man works. They are very far from being rich, but they somehow manage and that's how life is. :)
     
  16. pwarbi

    pwarbi Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2016
    Messages:
    119
    Likes Received:
    40
    Just touching on the point of not being able to choose a gender, I know a couple that wanted a daughter and a son. Their first born was a daughter, so was their second and third. They kept trying and after 8 girls!...They finally got to have a son. I guess that poses the question how many times do you keep trying before you just accept the fact that it's not meant to be?

    After their son was born they didn't have any more because they had finally got their wish and had a boy, and fair play to them. I'm not sure I'd have been able to cope with 8 daughters though, and I'd have maybe given up after the third!
     
    Last edited: Dec 15, 2016
    to7update likes this.
  17. workingbuck

    workingbuck Active Member

    Joined:
    Dec 12, 2016
    Messages:
    174
    Likes Received:
    54
    I think two would be enough and they should have a t least 3 year gap in between. though my wife wants triplets plus another two which makes it five, I do think it would be a lot of fun but too expensive at the same time. But if we can afford raising triplets, or 5 children, I won't have any problem with that.
     
  18. kokimboka

    kokimboka New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2016
    Messages:
    26
    Likes Received:
    4
    I have two boys and God willing someday we would like to try out for a girl.That is a may be.My husband is not so enthusiastic about another baby,after what I went through during my second pregnancy.Babies are such a blessing,when I was single, I always dreamt of having many children,like 4 or 6.Well,that dream changed when I gave birth to my first born. It is not an easy job to raise kids.I think its one of the most demanding jobs ever.
     
  19. Binu

    Binu Member

    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2016
    Messages:
    72
    Likes Received:
    6
    There is a disagreement between my husband and me regarding how many child we should have. My husband says one child is enough, we cannot bear the financial, psychological, emotional, moral responsibility to raise another child. However, I want two child, one boy and one girl. I want my children to have a confidante in their home. Siblings have a good bonding.
     
  20. to7update

    to7update Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    261
    Likes Received:
    75
    lol, 8 girls is too much, but I am guessing that if they had that many is because they have plenty of love to share and the economy to support it. A big expectation is on the shoulders of that boy though! :D
     
    pwarbi likes this.
  21. firstcry

    firstcry Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2016
    Messages:
    111
    Likes Received:
    29
    Having more babies means we need more resources to take care of them in a good manner. Keeping in mind today's rising cost on education and other factors I think it is not good to have more babies than we can afford to take care. Another thing is that we have to divide out attention on all kids if we have a lot of them to take care of. But if we have only a few we can focus on them more effectively.

    In today's competitive world we have to ensure the best education and other amenities for our kids. Otherwise they would not be able to survive in the present world and good education is a must for a winning career.
     
  22. to7update

    to7update Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    261
    Likes Received:
    75
    You have written well @firstcry and let me tell you, the food at my house disappears at light-speed as those kids eat everything they see! :D Also, clothes seem to shrink on their bodies, so it's a lot of work and expense, but we do love them a lot. :)
     
  23. pwarbi

    pwarbi Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2016
    Messages:
    119
    Likes Received:
    40
    In a way I do feel a bit sorry for the boy, as even though I'm sure the parents don't put any extra pressure on him, I'm sure that as he grows up he'll feel a certain amount because...well, he is the only boy after all. I think them days are gone now where the male children in a family are expected to get better jobs or be better educated than the females, but in some peoples minds he is going to be looked at differently and almost be expected to make the family proud whereas girl number 5 of 8 can just get on with her life without being scrutinised.
     
    firstcry and to7update like this.
  24. to7update

    to7update Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    261
    Likes Received:
    75
    Yeah, at the same time he will be lucky in the future haha, just imagine him going out with the sisters and all the older friends! :D A long way until that happens though and yes, I don't think more is expected from boys than girls these days.
     
  25. Jasmin Cottontail

    Jasmin Cottontail Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2016
    Messages:
    159
    Likes Received:
    57
    I would love to have 3, 2 boys and 1 girl. But I'll be happy whatever God will give me. As long as they are healthy and beautiful :)
     
    to7update likes this.
  26. tony

    tony Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    222
    Likes Received:
    32
    I agree with your stand to have at least two children, a boy and a girl. The child may need have a sibling to share with, which I guess is fine for the upbringing and psychology of the young child. I also think the parents will be more fulfilled with two children than just one
     
  27. firstcry

    firstcry Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2016
    Messages:
    111
    Likes Received:
    29
    I think it's OK if they have enough resources to take care of nine kids. As you rightly mentioned nowadays male and female children are equal; provided we are financially sound to give them good education and other facilities. Female children can contribute greatly to the overall growth of the family if they are well educated. In our country in all major sectors (public and private) a certain percentage of female reservation is a must. So if a female is educated she will be at great advantage.

    But personally I feel there is no need of a special consideration for females as they are as smart as males. What they were lacking in the past was an opportunity to excel in this male dominated world. Time has changed now.
     
    Last edited: Dec 18, 2016
    pwarbi likes this.
  28. to7update

    to7update Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    261
    Likes Received:
    75
    Times have really changed and I do feel women are dominating now, even if many times that is not reflected yet in wages.

    Back to baby talk though :), I wouldn't mind at all having more kids and a lot of people ask me and wife when are we going for the girl haha, but the wife doesn't even want to hear about it, I suppose she is happy with just two. :)
     
    pwarbi likes this.
  29. pwarbi

    pwarbi Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 22, 2016
    Messages:
    119
    Likes Received:
    40
    In the past it seemed that everyone thought that a family had to have children between certain years, but these days that isn't the case. Women are getting pregnant at older ages now, and they don't have to have their children all in their 20's or early 30's so even if your wife thinks 2 is enough now, there's nothing to say in a few years time she might change her mind (depending on how old you both are of course)
     
    firstcry and to7update like this.
  30. tony

    tony Active Member

    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2016
    Messages:
    222
    Likes Received:
    32
    In my view I am thinking having two or a maximum of four children would just be fine. Well one can plan to have any number of children, one very important thing is being able to cater and provide every other need for the children when the time comes.
     

Share This Page